Slowing down

Since I arrived home last Friday, I have been busy with preparing for our guests then enjoying their presence.  Sunday night Randy's sister, Shelley, and her significant other arrived, though we didn't see them till Monday morning when they went with Randy to the Memorial Day ceremony at the flagpole here; Randy played in the band which provided music.  Then shortly after noon, K, E and e arrived.  Later a friend stopped by, then Randy's aunt and uncle, his cousin and wife arrived for supper.  Little e handled all these new people very well.  Tuesday E and K worked, while I watched e.  Shelley and Steve came by before going out for the day, then they had dinner at Randy's cousin's before coming back to Alameda for the community band concert.  I watched e so K and E could also attend the concert, which consisted of music from Disney movies.  Yesterday e and her parents went to San Francisco on BART to witness a couple of friends getting married at City Hall; after the ceremony and lunch, e was introduced to several of K's co-workers at the SF office.  They came home on the ferry.  So a day of firsts for the baby!  I managed to prepare a quilt back for the Dancing Nines quilt but my hands weren't up to pinning the layers together.

 Dinner was Chinese take-out before I left for the final choir rehearsal of the spring.  This morning Shelley and Steve stopped by to see e one last time on their way to a conference in Twenty Nine Palms.  Whew!!

We sometimes complain a little that no one comes to see us, so when they do we make a big deal of it, I guess.

I have managed to take a couple of short walks with e; I enjoy the cooler weather and hope she does.  Today when I wasn't playing with or feeding e, I read part of The Cruelest Month, third in a series about a Canadian police detective.  The author, Louise Penny, is excellent.  Her characters are unique and believable, and the set up of the series is good.  Tomorrow a good friend is coming to meet e and visit with me.  Saturday there may be dim sum, and Sunday K is talking about going to Davis to spend time with his brother and drive a back-loader.  So never a dull moment at our house!  But it does look like life will be a bit calmer for the rest of the baby's visit.

Company's coming!

Today I've been preparing for guests.  Yes, they are family, but still....I want the house clean.  So after a little organ practice I went to Safeway to stock up on some essentials as well as some things I know K and E like that we don't normally have on hand.  This afternoon I've cleaned bathrooms (I like having 2 1/2 baths till it's time to clean them), done some laundry (not finished yet), and vacuumed.  Now it's 5:30 and I'm about done for the day, except our bed is naked (sheets in washer) and the blue room still is not ready to be used.

Randy's sister and her significant other are on their way via I-80 and should arrive tomorrow night.  They had ice on the road in Wyoming this morning.  Imagine that!  K and E and e are on their way, too, leaving home VERY early this morning and driving first to Los Angeles for a couple of days with K's family, a lovely way to break up the drive to Alameda.  They plan to arrive here Monday in the early afternoon.

I will be happy when everyone is here, but the getting ready is not my favorite part.

Aromas and memories

This morning as we walked we saw the landscape crew cutting grass, edging the walks, blowing leaves.  The smell of that freshly cut grass brought back memories of my summer job during college days.  Following in the footsteps of other relatives I got a job working in corn pack for Joan of Arc in Hoopeston, Illinois, a town about 25 miles north of where we lived and where both my parents were born and raised.  Central Illinois had, and probably still has, rich soil good for growing soy beans, corn, asparagus, tomatoes, lots of things, and Hoopeston had plants to can these vegetables.  Migrant farm workers came through town to pick the crops; I remember seeing the rough places/camps where they lived.  But local residents also were hired.

Corn pack started in late July or early August (whenever the corn was ripe) and ended by Labor Day.  I started on second shift, from about 4:00 till the day's pick was processed, which might be as late as 11.  After the sweet corn was picked, it was dumped into a parking lot across the street then shoveled onto conveyor belts that lifted it up and carried it over to the building I was in.  It poured into bins, each of which had two workers who moved individual ears into slots on a belt that took them through a cutter that removed the stem then rolled them till the leaves and silk were off.  Another belt moved the corn upstairs where workers with sharp knives cut out bad spots, some with worms, and sent them on to the next building where the corn was cooked then canned.  I worked mostly on the cutters but sometimes upstairs with the knives.  Eventually I was on day shift with regular hours.  It was hot, noisy, dirty work and I didn't eat corn for a long time after.  This job was different than anything I'd ever done before (or since).

The best part about corn pack was staying with my mom's parents.  Grandma and Grandpa were cheerful, loving people who had moved to Hoopeston about 1917 from southern Kentucky.  Grandma had a great sense of humor and talked a lot but I knew she cared about me.  Grandpa didn't say much but had a tender heart.  A couple of years ago I had a lot of fun writing a long story about their lives, then sending copies to my cousins.

Anyway, the smell of the grass took me back in time.

Making progress

(Second post of the day)

How toys have changed in thirty years!  And yet certain concepts remain the same.  Little e loves to play in her Fisher Price Rainforest Gym, which consists of a bright plastic mat about 32 by 32 inches with two rigid arches going diagonally from corner to corner.  Each segment has at least one fabric loop used to suspend a little animal of hard plastic or soft fabric which the baby can bat at as she lies on the mat.  (If you want to see one of these mats, check Amazon.). Where the arches intersect in the center is a music box which plays four songs and noises such as bird calls and frogs croaking and which also has two lights that flash.  Watching e interact with these toys for five months now we have seen such growth!  From those early days of just lying still, watching the lights, her parents talking about the animals, and then her arms and legs moving in seemingly random fashion batting at the animals, to today when she can use one hand then bring up the other to capture the toucan or elephant and even reach overhead to grab the butterflies.  It's been an amazing process, seeing the gradual development of strength and coordination.  Years ago we had a mobile that hung over the crib, but I don't remember that it was interactive like this.

Another change that I saw just today--e is learning.that to roll from her tummy to her back she cannot have her arms both perpendicular to her body, like wings on an airplane.  Today she placed her right arm up alongside her head and lo and behold she rolled right over!  Now if she can remember this trick...

Preparing

My long weekend at home was lovely.  I bought groceries, cooked, vacuumed, practiced, normal activities.  I also had lunch with friends both Friday and Saturday, and dinner with one on Thursday.  The choir sang beautifully Sunday.  And Randy and I made progress in our preparations for e and her parents' arrival next Monday.  Although our house has four bedrooms, only one is used daily for sleeping since our girls moved out.  The biggest one (the green room) is our TV room, one is my sewing/scrapbook in room, and one (the blue room) has a twin bed and our horns/practice materials.  Two daughters painted their rooms years ago, so now they are known by their colors instead of "Sarah's room" or "Emily's room," partly to help us all realize things change.  K sleeps in the blue room when he comes up on business.  We added a small crib and bed to that room; we moved the desk into the green room so E can work while e naps.  I brought our old high chair into the house from the garage and cleaned it up so e will have a perch while I work in the kitchen.

Last night we went to a Japanese restaurant for dinner to celebrate some good news K received at work, then we moved furniture to prepare for the carpet cleaners who came this morning.  While the carpets are drying e and I are hanging out in the kitchen/dining room.

There may be another post later today, but right now e and I need to read a book.

Home mid-week

Rehearsal went smoothly.  I enjoyed hearing the choir sing the music I'd been listening to on my iPad.  Live music is indeed different!  Five instrumentalists enhance the piano accompaniment:  flute, oboe/English horn, clarinet, French horn and bassoon.  I wish I could hear the choir from out in the pews, but I'll have to wait.  One of the singers usually has her family video the special music presentations, then she posts them on her YouTube channel.  (So if any of you want to hear us, let me know and I'll send you a link.)

Thursday I did some laundry, accidentally stepping on Randy's toes in the process because I kinda messed up his schedule.  Oops!  I'll have to be careful, pay attention to his routines.  I practiced then went to the grocery store.  It almost feels like I have forgotten how to plan meals.  Randy said with a smile, "Imagine how I feel.  It's been 37 years since I had to plan my meals.  Your 3 months is nothing!"  Dena joined us for sweet and spicy chicken, then Randy and I took a walk.  Although I wore a heavy sweatshirt, I wished I had on long sleeves under it.  The wind as we headed toward the bay was bracing!

K texted that e wasn't happy going to bed for a nap but did enjoy chilling in her swing.  I know how that feels--to think I'm reading her signals but discover she doesn't mean it.  Daddy and daughter time, priceless!

Today I will do more laundry, have lunch with Carol, practice the Requiem some more, and continue to work on setting up the blue room for E, K and e's arrival on Memorial Day.

A short week

This past weekend was pretty normal.  The worship and music committee met Saturday morning at 9, then I practiced.  On the way home I stopped at Kohl's to spend the $10 Kohl's cash I had earned when I bought the capris.  After lunch I cleaned up the old porta-crib we used when Emily was a baby.  Why did I do that, you might ask.  Because on Memorial Day E, K and e arrive for a 2-week working vacation!  E will telecommute, K will take the ferry to his San Francisco office, and I will care for e in my home instead of hers.  I will enjoy being in Alameda for an extended stay, Randy will get time with e, E and K will bask in the coolness (if one can bask in coolness).  Everyone wins!  More on this later.

Tomorrow I return home for the choir's dress rehearsal with instrumentalists for their performance Sunday of Mark Hayes' Requiem.  I have loved working on this music, playing along with a professional recording of the piece to have some idea of how Julie will direct it, but this is not the same thing as following a live director with live singers.  So E and K are covering child care for a couple of days to enable me to make the rehearsal.  The 6 movements of the Requiem will be spread out through the service so listeners are not overwhelmed, though it seems to me that this music is very accessible even with some Latin mixed in with English.

As those of you with children may recall, just when you think you have a routine established the baby says, "Gotcha!"  And so it is with e.  She seems to be waking a bit earlier each day, perhaps as the sun  lights the room earlier.  Black-out curtains are being discussed!

Connections

Last Saturday our son-in-law who's in the Army was on assignment in the Phoenix area and stopped by to see E, K, and of course little e.  His older brother has two children, so S has some experience with little ones.  I was happy he made the effort to spend time with his wife's sister and her family, and I was sorry to miss him.

K went to the Bay Area on Wednesday for 3 days of work.  He stayed at our house and each morning walked down to the ferry terminal to ride the ferry over to the City.  It turned out his sister was also in San Francisco on business, so last night their brother (who is finishing his doctorate at UCDavis) and Randy met them for dinner at the Ferry Building.  I know Randy enjoyed the evening with these young people.

These are just two recent examples of new family ties.

Connections...because of our daughters, Randy and I have met new people, not only their in-laws but also some of their family friends as we have been invited to dinners and parties, people we probably wouldn't have met otherwise but with whom we can converse and expand our views.

20 years

Twenty years ago today my mother died of leukemia, only three months after her diagnosis.  She spent one month in the hospital undergoing chemo, but the doctor didn't give us much hope.  Then she went home, with regular visits from hospice caregivers until her last day when she returned to the hospital and died surrounded by family singing the old hymns.  Not me, though.  I had visited the previous week, and though we could tell she was slipping away we didn't know how long it might be.  So on Friday Randy and I returned to Alameda, where our girls were staying with friends; Mom did not want them to see her and then remember her as sick.  Then on Sunday Mom died.  I went back to Illinois for the funeral and returned home on Mother's Day.  As you can imagine, this time of year evokes introspection.  (Both of Randy's paternal grandparents and Mom died within a six-week span that spring.)

Did we have a smooth relationship?  It was OK, not perfect.  What child doesn't have an issue or two with her mother?  There was one thing in particular I wanted to talk to her about, but I kept putting it off, and once she was sick I just couldn't bring myself to do it.  So regret lives in my soul.

Our daughters were 13, 11 and 7 at the time.  Randy's mom had already died, in 1985, of cancer; neither older girl remembered her.  Our parents all lived in the same town (more or less) which was convenient, but because we lived some 2200 miles away the girls didn't see their grandparents often.  Generally we'd fly out every couple of years, and grandparents would come here in alternate years.  But it was not at all the same as when we were growing up, just a short distance from grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins.

This is one reason I am here in Phoenix.  I want to interact with e, with her parents.  Mom died at 65; I will turn 65 in September, if nothing unexpected happens.  She had just retired and had plans for her free time.  I know that nothing is certain.  This sentence from Elizabeth Strout's The Burgess Boys struck me:  "No one wants to believe something is too late, but it is always becoming too late, and then it is."  From another book I've read this spring:  "Life is never as long as we want it to be, and wasted time can never be recovered."

Carpe diem.

Afternoon slugs

One thing I've noticed is after E's 3rd nap of the day, usually sometime between 2:30 and 4, both of us are tired.  The eating goes well when she wakes up, but the play time...not so much.  It's almost like I'm out of fresh ideas on what to do, and e is not quite as cheerful.  So I'm always glad when E takes over.  And e brightens up when her parents are here.

E and K left about 6:30 last night for the movie.  Little e took a bottle, in 2 courses with a brief nap between, and was asleep by shortly after 7.  I then worked on my current quilt project, the one I call my Legos quilt.  Cut entirely from scraps, each piece is cut 1 1/2 by 2 1/2 inches, sewn end to end then sewn in a spiral (angular, not round) effect around the center.  I finished row 16 last night but it was almost 10 and E and K came home, so I turned off the sewing machine.

This morning is cloudy and in the 60's.  When we took our walk, I didn't need to put up the top/shade on the stroller at all.  Normally the shade goes up and down as we move in and out of the sunlight.  It was pleasant.

A new week

Today is E and K's second anniversary.  K has a mantra to help him remember the date because he knows how important that is.  Ready?  "May the fourth be with you."  As you might guess, he's a Star Wars fan.  Randy and I were married the day after my birthday; he figured it would be easier to recall both dates that way.  And he does!  I will put e to bed tonight so her parents can go to the new Avengers movie.

My weekend at home was pleasant.  I went to church earlier than usual to practice because I was invited by Linda to her birthday breakfast at Crab Cove beach.  What a lovely time that was, sun, breezes, delicious food and meeting new women, with lots of laughing and cheerful conversation.  On the way home I stopped at Kohl's to buy another pair of capris; I have 2 pairs here, but one doesn't have pockets and I need to keep my phone with me to ensure I hear the alarm reminding me it's time for e's medicine.  (That would sound odd to anyone without a cell phone; I set alarms on mine daily.)  I found denim capris as well as a couple of shirts.

Sunday afternoon Randy attended the installation service of a friend at First Pres, so Dena came over for a game of Scrabble before she took me to the airport.  Yes, we felt the earthquake, just a little bump.

Last night we had a thunderstorm.  I didn't hear much rain, but when e and I took our morning walk we saw some large puddles.  One even had a couple of ducks swimming in it.  The air felt fresh and a bit cooler.  I now see e beginning to stir via the monitor, so it's time to feed her.