How sweet it is!

This past weekend was lovely!  Friday night Randy hosted the dinner/game night group.  He made  a Key Lime pie for their dessert, and when I walked in from the airport there were two slices left, one for each of us.  So my time at home began with tart sweetness.  Saturday I had a haircut then organ practice.  Randy and I talked a bit about his work before I went to Dena's for lunch and two games of Scrabble. Catching up with mail and paperwork took a while before supper.  Sunday's worship service went smoothly, although during my offertory my fingers became sticky which made a couple of the runs less than smooth.  Lunch, planning music for the next week or two, packing up, a short walk then back to the airport for my return to Phoenix.  K's flight from Des Moines was delayed but due in about the same time as mine, so I met him in baggage claim where he awaited his golf clubs.  Then we took the Sky Train over to east economy parking, and he drove us both home.  Little e was already asleep, but he played with her this morning before leaving for the office.  Her biggest accomplishment last week while he was away was learning to stand while holding on to the couch, so he was eager to see that.

One advantage of this commuting is the opportunity to talk with K alone; he usually picks me up on Sunday, while E usually drops me off on Friday.  So he and I are getting to know each other better.  He calls me Grandma Starr, and I call him Daddy K.

Wednesday e goes in for another EEG; next week she visits the neurologist, who will discuss the results.

Face to face

One of the best things we did last summer when we were in the Midwest was to buy a camera for my dad's computer, hook it up, and help him open a Skype account, then show him how it works.  Since then we have Skyped more than called.  It is so much more personal to see each other instead of just hearing a voice on the phone.  Yesterday e sat up alone and chattered away to her great grandparents, whom she has not met in person yet.  It was so much fun!  But E is concerned about "screen time" for the baby, so I had to end the call.  Even at six months e seems very aware of the "magic boxes" her parents and I use that have colorful pictures and movement.  The American Academy of Pediatricians (or whatever the official name is) recommends no or very limited screen time until age two.  E sometimes Facetimes K if he is working late and e is about to go to bed so he can tell her goodnight.  But no TV yet, just these person to person interactions.

To help or not to help

A little frustration can be a good thing, don't you think?  It can make us try a little harder, stretch a bit further, see a new solution.  So when e is fussing a bit as she reaches for a toy or book, I usually wait before jumping in to help in order to allow her to face the obstacle and perhaps overcome it.  She plays independently quite a bit, exploring her toys, watching the dog and cat, listening to me practice my music, and she seems to enjoy doing so.

One thing the physical therapist mentioned surprised me, though it makes perfect sense and I don't know why I didn't think of it myself.  All these long sounds, high-pitched vocalizations and such strengthen her abdominal muscles to help her with sitting up then walking.  She sits confidently for  longer and longer periods now.  So while I may cover my ears occasionally or grimace at the shock to my eardrums, I guess it's all for the best.

Week 17 begins

Yesterday morning K left for a week in Des Moines on business.  Liz drove up to the Shane store in Scottsdale to have her rings cleaned and to pick up E's rings.  She brought back In 'n' Out for lunch for us.  The two of us have played Words with Friends (a Scrabble-like game) daily on our mobile devices for several years, but it is always fun to play in live time when we're together, so we enjoyed playing two games of Scrabble in person while e entertained herself--what a baby!  We picked up E after work at 4:30 and went to the mall.  Liz wanted to visit Athleta and a couple of other stores; I was looking for a pair of shorts (can't imagine why!), and E wanted the break.  Little e did fine in her stroller.  I had mixed up some oatmeal for her, but when we sat down about 5:30 to give it to her, it was not much thicker than milk.  I guess I didn't notice as I stirred it, or perhaps I assumed it would thicken as it sat.  So E couldn't keep a straight face as she spooned this thin cereal into e's mouth, but e kept opening her mouth wide for more.  It was a hoot!  E took Liz to the airport for her midnight flight.

So as week 17 begins, the house has quieted down, and we will try to get back into our routine.

Father's Day weekend

We've had a busy week.  Little e had her six-month check up and passed with flying colors.  In fact, the pediatrician proclaimed she is "blowing it out of the water right now," with her growth, sitting up, rolling over.  She is beginning to have solid foods three times a day in addition to nursing.

Thursday afternoon I drove to Sky Harbor Airport and picked up Randy and Liz.  Randy and I stayed at the hotel down the street; Liz was at the house that night, then at the hotel for the rest of her stay.  Friday E and Liz did sister things while Randy and I watched e.  Liz and E took e to the swimming pool; she looked so cute in her little swimsuit and hat.  About 10 PM we went to the airport to collect Sarah and Erik, who stayed at the house.  Saturday we had breakfast out, an early Father's Day celebration.  Lunch was at a local brewery/pub called The Perch, which in addition to beers features birds.  Sarah and I visited a quilt shop where she purchased some fabric for a quilt for their couch.  Then it was off to the Arizona Diamondbacks baseball game, e's first major league game.  The San Diego Padres won, 6-1.   Due to excessive heat Chase Field closed their roof, and it was quite comfortable inside.  Imagine...an air-conditioned ball park!  Sunday was low-key.  E and e made breakfast for K.  For lunch K grilled sausages and corn on the cob, and I made date cake (one of Randy's favorites).  Then I took Randy, Sarah and Erik back to Sky Harbor; Liz leaves tonight.

We missed Liz's husband, but he was on call and unable to travel across country.  My dad and his wife had planned to come but he had a health issue get in the way.  I think a good time was had by all, even with the 100+ degrees.  Randy reported that one of the flight attendants on his flight, which was going on to St. Louis, had said, "You're going to Phoenix in June?"  We got some good pictures of e with her daddy, her aunts, her grandpa, and three generations.  She already knows when her mom's phone is pointed at her, and she smiles.

Adjusting to home

One of the challenges of this commuting lifestyle is adjusting to being at home, shifting gears from childcare to husband-care.  While I am away Randy creates his own rhythm of meals, work, household chores.  When I'm home for the weekend, it's easy to slip back into old habits, the things I used to do on a Saturday, rather than just enjoy being home.  I don't consciously mean to ignore him or say his rhythm is not adequate, but after years and years it's difficult to relinquish my notions of how things should be.  Perhaps I am trying to show I can be away all week and run the house just as well as before. Some weeks it's easier than others to let go.  This past weekend was not one of those.  I spent time practicing, shopping for groceries, cleaning house on Saturday, and we didn't take a walk.  We did watch a movie, " Journey of a Hundred Steps," which was delightful.  Sunday Randy went to FPC Berkeley as usual for the worship service then surprised me by coming to Trinity because, as he told me during the passing of the peace, we don't have much time together these days.  What a great guy!

I have good intentions, but sometimes that's just not enough.

Week 15 begins

Fourteen weeks ago I arrived in Phoenix ready to learn the ins and outs of caring for an infant.  I didn't remember a lot of details other than keep the baby dry and fed.  But E and K have taught me some skills, and I suppose some techniques have just come back to me, so I feel much more comfortable now.  The physical therapist visited this morning and, after observing e said she is on track in her development.  She gave us some suggestions about how to use tummy time to prepare e for crawling and standing.  A baby sure grows a lot in 14 weeks!  I am thankful to have this opportunity to participate in E's life.

Little e at our house

Having e and her parents at our house for nearly two weeks provided some insight for all of us.  For instance, Randy saw how schedule-driven E and K's life is.  Medication three times a day means someone must be available and aware of those times; it's mostly routine now but still if we go out in the afternoon the med must go with us.  And going to a movie at night requires planning.  Putting e to bed at about the same time each night means thinking ahead.  Is it bath night?  Is K on his way home so he can see e and play with her before bed? And so on.  When our children were infants, I didn't work full time, and Randy's hours were somewhat flexible.

I enjoyed the cooler weather, walks along the lagoon, pointing out Mallard ducks and Canada geese to e.  We could walk comfortably any time of day.

I felt I did more since it was my house.  I did the grocery shopping and cooked the meals, both because I enjoy doing so and because I wanted to give E a break.  And she appreciated that.  I changed their sheets and towels when I changed ours.  I sewed a bit on the nine-patch quilt but not as much as I had envisioned doing.

E and K drove their new SUV up.  I drove it twice.  The main problem I had was getting e out of the car while she was buckled in to her car seat.  Her infant seat clicks into a base that remains in the car; e's 16 or 17 pounds plus the seat is heavy and awkward for me.  I might have taken e on errands with me if I had been more adept with the car seat.  I guess I need to practice with just the seat, to become familiar with that, then with e in the seat.  E's car is a sedan and easier for me to deal with, not that we run around much.  E and K are talking about another long visit to us in August.

Sunday night, after we were all back in Phoenix, E said the visit home gave her a better understanding of what things were like for me at their house.  At our house she was comfortable, had meals prepared for her, had things to do, was with family.  But back in her own place, she said, "There's no place like home."  And it's true.

Just the two of us

Thursday morning my friend Linda came over to meet e and talk with me about being a grandmother.  She has one married daughter and one daughter who will marry in August, so she's thinking ahead, wondering how she would respond if one of them needed her help.  Linda is easy to talk to and often asks penetrating questions.

Little e hit a milestone Friday morning when she ate her first solid food, about a teaspoon of California avocado mashed up with a bit of breast milk.  She smiled a lot and almost smacked her lips!  We were glad E and K shared that special moment with us.  E did not spend much time at her computer that day but rather did some laundry and packed up clothes and toys so they could leave after supper, when e was ready for sleep.  They drove away about 7 PM and arrived at K's mom's house in LA about 1:30.  We had the house to ourselves, for the first time in nearly two weeks.

Saturday morning, after some time with my honey, I made a label for a quilt destined for Randy's cousin's newest grand-baby, and we planned the rest of our day.  While Randy went to the cousin's birthday party and dropped off the quilt, I practiced organ, then he picked me up and we did some grocery shopping.  As I cooked a chicken/black bean chili, he ran an errand.  When he returned he made cornbread with me watching; he had mentioned that although he followed my recipe, his cornbread didn't turn out like mine and he wanted to see if I had any suggestions.  It turns out he doesn't exactly follow the recipe, but neither of us could figure out why his small changes (like sifting the dry ingredients) would make a difference.

Church went smoothly this morning, and when I finish this post I will pack my messenger bag and be ready to take a walk with Randy before heading to the airport and Phoenix.  I always place my bag on a particular chair in our bedroom and put in or near the bag those things that need to go to Phoenix with me.  That way I don't have to look all over the house for my phone charger or the book I want to take.

I've been thinking about being here with E, K and e for two weeks, how my life (and their's and Randy's) was different.  Maybe tomorrow morning I'll try to get those insights written down and share them with you.

One of those days

Tuesday e really fought me when I tried to put her down for a nap.  We had gone to the church because Jessica wanted to meet her and to let e play the organ, which she did with aplomb, using both manuals.  About 11:30 she indicated she was sleepy so we went through the ritual (reading, sleep sack, singing till she was very relaxed) and I laid her in her crib.  Waaaa!  Screams erupted, not little fussing sounds but full-blown anger.  I picked her up, and almost immediately she calmed and fell asleep on my shoulder.  After a couple of minutes I returned her to her crib.  Waaaa!  We must have done this three or four times.  I held her longer each time I picked her up.  My back began to ache.  After thirty minutes of this up and down I decided maybe she was hungry and gave her a bottle.  She stayed up till her 2:00 medication then slept for 45 minutes.  I don't know if I misread her cues, if she had tummy troubles, or what, but it was not much fun.  Later she and I both needed fresh clothes, so maybe it was tummy issues.

Little e is usually calm and cheerful, but not always.  And Tuesday was one of those days.

Halfway point

Friday morning while e played on the floor beside me I taped down the backing of the nine-patch quilt and began the pinning process.  Rather than hand-sewing the three layers together I use safety pins.  Carol came after lunch and we had a good visit.  She brought a pattern I will use to make a loose shirt with some bright green corduroy I bought several years ago.  I'm hoping it will be similar to the popular L. L. Bean shirt.

Saturday I went to the grocery store, then we all met Randy's aunt and uncle at East Ocean Restaurant for dim sum, which is always fun.  We stopped by Keri's house hoping to see her and her new baby, but when Lynn noticed their truck was not in the driveway we left, not realizing Keri was in the backyard with the children.  I practiced organ for a bit before making meatloaf for dinner.  Or was the meatloaf Friday and pea soup Saturday?  I guess if I'm going to write about specific meals I'd better blog more frequently!

Sunday morning E brought e to church so choir members and others who have prayed for her could meet her.  She didn't cry at all, even when another baby did, and I enjoyed seeing her interact with more new faces.  K's brother drove down from Davis, and we ate lunch at Speisekammer, a German restaurant here in town.  Since the sun was out, we ate on the patio under a big umbrella.  Little e took it all in stride; K gave her a bottle while we waited for our food, then she was content to be held and look around at things.  We walked down Park Street to Tucker's for ice cream before heading home.

Little e is beginning to sit up on her own for 20 to 30 seconds or more.  What fun to see her do this!  On our walk yesterday morning we came upon a group of ducks on the grass, so I took e out of the stroller so she could see them better.  I think she liked seeing these creatures waddling around and quacking.  We have spread a blanket out in front of the house a couple of times so e can lie on it and watch the leaves blow and hear jets and different birds.  One day I put her on her tummy on the edge of the blanket and let her feel the grass.  She didn't seem too sure about that!

My visit home is more than half done now.  More about that later.